Anyway, that's how I arrived at a blue and yellow glowing screen displaying a job in my field that is in this county. That's a big deal. I stared at it for awhile. What if? I know I can't do that, though. I can't NOT stay home because of the endless appointments that my totally-worth-it-every-single-day middle child has weekly. If I went to work, there would be no one to take him to speech or audiology or surgeon check ups or meetings with his teacher of the deaf (TOD). It's not in my cards right now. I stared at the screen until I heard, "Mom, are you going to watch this with us?" And right then, I snapped out of it for the time being. I needed to stop with the worry and focus on the sweet kids right in front of me, asking me to watch Happy Feet 2 or something like that. Off I went, to snuggle with them.
Because when has God not provided? Never.
The jobs can wait.
I get to watch these kids grow right before my very eyes...and that's a pretty sweet deal.